I wish I can love. I wish someone will love me.
Close your eyes and imagine a world where emotion didn’t exist. Close your eyes and imagine a world where pain never occurred. It’s crazy right?
Why do I do this to myself?
I’m under so much emotional stress that it’s rediculous. I’m just a sack of jealous ball sack with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. All I really want is love. I just want to feel it, I want to cherish it. I want something that I know feels right but my shyness and silence keep me from breaking through.
I’m like shit, I think I fucked it up. I can see it in her demeanor. Maybe it’s me? Maybe I don’t show enough or maybe she’s moved on. I can’t keep living life as if shits going to get handed to me. I’m tired of running and talking myself in circles just to get myself to shut up.
I feel so lonely it’s exhausting. I just don’t understand how people just move from one another, I just don’t get it. I don’t feel right even being this person anymore but I have to do it. I have to live out what’s been bestowed in front of me in order to succeed. But my problem is how do I do that? I’ve been given no tools to help either.
Fuck all that I have brought to myself
Fuck all of the problems I create to detest myself
Fuck the purpose of this note that I’m making
Fuck the the science behind this madness I’m the saddest
Fuck the people who deem me as a push over
Fuck my silence because it’s what’s kept me quiet when the lady is over
Fuck the faces that I see that care not to look at me
I’ve dreamt of death but scared to face it but ask for ends when the begining is basic
Fuck the fact that I can’t do right when in plain sight
Fuck the fact that I cant speak my mind and start a conversion with a beautiful woman in mind
Fuck these emotions although it’s guidence pleading to riot
Fuck my life I said it right but no I shall stay strong and win the fight
So tonight I got hit by a car.
It was crazy.
My life is just so weird. These past few months have been strange. See before I used to live life where I was more concerned about the past few weeks and kept moving forward without looking back. But now in recent time (sorry im high) I’ve begun to look over these periods in months and see a shift in me still not being shit.
I can’t think like this forever though, I mean who’s to say that tomorrow might be that day I my music is heard by the right people? Who’s to say that my edit on instagram won’t get me a skateboard sponsor. Do you see what I’m chasing after? Literally dreams. Dreams that for some reason within me seem so unrealistic that I don’t want it. But the problem is that at the same time I can envision in great detail that fortune will come. I can’t just go blindly though, for I must focus and build an empire of which will continue to feed the next generations.
My friends just don’t call me Afro or Afrodamus to be just saying this. I mean the whole goal is to climb the mental construct that we have created that runs the world and achieve the dreams, goals, and ambitions of a much brighter future. A future that I feel will give me the opportunity to create more and open minds, for the ones who see no more than what they choose to perceive.
I think its time to change the channel.
~ keep it all smiles
I can never really stick with anything, kind of like this blog. I told myself that I would hop on here daily or at least monthly and make a post but it seems to have not happened. As of recent I spend my days on tumblr reblogging random shit that I find scrolling up on my timeline.
What a way to enjoy life eh?
So as an attempt to get away from the comforts of my room, I made a trip to Heine Brothers, the coffee shop where I just so happen to make cool ass memories at. The sun is setting and my coffee is scalding hot. Might I mention that it’s 82 outside? I was out skating earlier but my skate session was cut short due to some guy who works in one of the buildings at this business complex came out to practice his golf swing. The last time I was skating in that area I think I may have pissed him off by the popping off my loud board as I flipped my deck to land some gnarly shit. Anywho, in respect I left because I’m pretty sure he had a long day at work and just wanted to swing his golf club in silence.
Besides the shenanigans of my everyday life, I just dropped a new single on Soundcloud. You should check it out.
I’m signing off for now, my brain is drawing a blank.
~ Keep it all smiles
Glen Steven ColenKurt witnessed a classmate’s suicide when he was just in 8th grade As an eighth grader Kurt discovered the body of a classmate who had committed suicide by hanging. It had a profound effect on him, a friend at the time stating that for the rest of the year he looked like “a…
I was gonna write a long sap ass post about how much I missed seeing Bam skate but tbh, he wouldn’t read it. haha He’s more stoked that he’s skating the streets of Barcelona more than anything. I’m so hyped he’s back on his board.
ps. Rob Dyrdek needs to stop making TV shows.
While often made out to be fierce competitors, Apple CEO Tim Cook and Google CEO Sundar Pichai recently shared dinner and a conversation together in Sillicon Valley. Images of the meal were shared on Facebook and discovered on MacGeneration. more…Filed under: Google Corporate
Now for a fanboy like me, this is a site to see. Two CEO’s from rival companies chopping it up over dinner is a spot that looks verrry expensive. The question posed by 9to5Google is “What are Tim and Sundar talking about?” Well Here’s my guess…
It’s something that I thought about all the time, an iPhone running Android, or vice versa. I wouldn’t be the first person to mention something like this, Steve Wozniak even thinks that Apple and Google should work together. I honestly think that if Tim and Sundar were to create a smartphone together and dropping all past altercations aside, they could topple the smartphone market with just one phone. The device would be the most powerful, elegantly designed piece of technology that this world will ever see. Not to mention that Tim and Sundar can also knock Samsung off their radar. I’m not saying that because I don’t like Samsung, it’s because both Apple and Google had conflicts with Samsung infringing their copyrighted technology.
So what do I think these two CEO’s are talking about? Building an iPhone/Pixel that runs on iOS-Android.
~ Keep it all smiles