U ON MY MIND DAY IN AND DAY OUT AND THIS SHIT IS FUCKIN WITH ME

Shes all I think about and is all I want… but I don’t know why.

Why am I so attracted to her?

Why do I fall into a hypnotized state everytime I’m around her, almost speechless because I don’t wanna say something toO silly. Why do I even have these feelings and spend days talking about it to myself.

why?

somedays I try to make myself cry because I just want that emotional relief but i just can’t. I’m constantly wrapping my head around multiple different realities, always lost in another world.

Like fuck, I wrote a whole song about this chick? DO YOU HEAR ME GUYS! I WROTE A WHOLE ENTIRE SONG ABOUT A WOMAN AND SHE DOESN’T HAVE THE SLIGHTEST CLUE THAT ITS ABOUT HER. SHE HEARD IT!!!

i feel dumb sometimes because i make things way harder than life is supposed to be.

~ keep it all smiles

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corrugated recycles

From time to time I tend to challenge myself with a little bit of bullshit.

Okay not really, I just thought that would be a good opening sentence because the rest of what I have to say may not even be relatable to you.

Its currently 71 degrees and rainy and here I stand with a laptop. My brain goes haywire just thinking about the actual history that has taken place at this house I live in. Before my parents moved in and brought me into this world apparently some old lady lived in my house.

Standing in the garage with the lightning illuminating off my keyboard, I can take a look and see the old wiring from when this garage had lights and a working door.

Today its bored up and those wires dangle loseley carrying no current like they once did.

I think something landed on my head and I’m not sure of what it could’ve been. Whatever it was had me swatting at my hair for 5 minutes only realising that I was just throwing more water all over my laptop cus my hair is SOAKED.

but whatever.

the internet needs to know that there are people like us who dwindle away at things that don’t even contribute to humanity. I mean shit, I know a guy who does nothing but watch anime by himself eating fast food all day. What kind of life is that?

i just write, i write bullshit becasue after its written i read through my poor grammar and laugh at my mistakes.

~ keep it all smiles

i laugh when im horny

My sunny days get perpetrated by black thoughts shading the horizon.

I often dream of different realities but none compare to the one that I’m living in at this very moment. It brings chills to my spine to even think such a way but who else really cares? I mean even though we travel the same frequency we’re all on different bands.

Without any of my misjudgment coming into play, it seems that what I see dwindling afar always seeps in the little crack it balances on. A rare but mystifying moment turns to sadness and grief. What does that even have to do with anything you might ask?

Well its simple.

nothing.

~ keep it all smiles

WWW.

As I grow older I’ve learned that the internet is a really big place. Thanks to cookies and all that other data that websites collect from you, the WORLD WIDE WEB as we know it, now has become small and personal.

I’m not sure how I feel about personalized internet. It used to be that back in the day you could just open internet explorer and read a wide variety of news articles. Now we have feeds like the ones we use on facebook, twitter, and instagram. These feeds do exactly where the name says, IT FEEDS US INFORMATION. But not just anything, it’s all personalized just for your enjoyment.

The internet holds a wealth of knowledge and what blows my mind is how we walk around with these supercomputers in our pockets using them to post Tik Tok videos. Like I’m talking about snapdragon chips and intel processors inside some thin ass plastic and here I am recording myself yelling about some shit that pissed me off the other day.

Personalized internet closes the doors to what we knew as the WORLD WIDE WEB. Its as if the only idea about the internet that we hold dearly too is net neutrality.

The purpose for all of this madness I wrote is the anger I’m starting to feel about the news apps that are installed on my phone. No matter what app I try I’m given multiple categories of different interest. That shits cool and all but I want news that is not directly geared towards my interest. I want news collectively from all sources jumbled into one.

either that or maybe im just trippen.

~ keep it all smiles

i think im back

Theres this thing I always try to do when I write now.

I remember when I first started blogging the way I would write consisted of a bunch of thoughts, ideas, and random nonsense. To this day I still write the same but I’m always trying to find this one frequency that made me feel like fluid.

I was starting to feel it until MSNBC came back on in the background and disturbed my train of thought with more MASS SHOOTING NEWS. I’m starting to get tired of hearing about this shit. Anybody else out there think that these massacre events are made up? I don’t want to start some drama or any conspiracy theory thinking, but can we all talk about this? Why are “deranged” human beings grabbing guns and murdering people?

AND WHO WROTE THAT SPEECH FOR TRUMP?

The fact of the matter is, I’m trying to reach that wave I like to ride on when I’m cruising away at the keyboard. This same keyboard has gotten me through a little bit of college by the way. Besides that, I want to be a writer again. I want to be that dude that once dreamed of writing up and drawing cartoons. That guy who watches anime and gets lost in another world. I just want reality to slow down for one second so I can get my head on straight enough to focus on what’s important to me and has created the person who brings these words to you.

~ keep it all smiles

Can’t believe it but read it

So I have this friend and we have a strange relationship. Now when I mean friend, I refer to them as just a mere associate all because the relationship is one sided.

It’s sometimes hard for me to grasp how we even have this weird dynamic that works for only so many hours. Once it’s done it’s over with and then we part until the next meeting.

I kinda don’t like it because its one of those things that come about when you’re placed in a situation that stems from the need of a particular item or life style, resulting you to take part in an activity.

None the less, it’s strange that these things just kind of come about but who am I to say what’s wrong and right when we all have the same misconception. Regardless, we wouldn’t even be able to understand it, not to mention the amount of time it would take.

What ever it is, I got to make some serious changes.

~ keep it all smiles

a stoner is…

A stoner is nothing more than an individual seeking to attain peace that cannot be found in this reality. In other words, this world is fucked up and full of influences. Reefer kinda filters that shit.

~ keep it all smiles

unauthorized

I have an issue.

I’ll go about it plain and simple with a whole lot of extra stuff because that’s how I be.

I want a girlfriend. I don’t know why, maybe it’s because I feel lonely, but whatever. I just do. Now having a significant other has been a thought that’s been in my mind ever since I was young. I want to blame it on how we look at humanity and and this whole relationship thing but I really don’t know. The fact of the matter is, I think it’s a humanly thing and right now at the age of 24 thats what has been on my mind. Right now in life I just want to focus on my creativity and let that flourish but I feel like the “wanting” of a “lover” in my world is hindering me.

I cannot fully say that the thought is destroying me because I just turn around and make another song, but when I hear my music it’s all the same bullshit just told differently over beats. I got this weird ass feeling of settlement and wanting to have the rock next to me holding me up. When I stop and look at how I am towards others, I begin to question if I am even ready. Like I’m totally the guy who believes that everything happens for a reason, so I never really tell myself something isn’t going to happen because at the end of the day we don’t know.

Right now I got a crush on a girl though. Haven’t even tried to display the confidence in wanting to get to know her because I’m a wimp. I build up my thoughts and always let the shit crash when there’s nothing else left to be added. That’s what I’ve done at this point. My hopes are very high but for no reason. I bitch out when I want to say anything and the conversation dies. I….. I’m just a fearful human who lets his emotions control how he interacts with other humans.

 

no point in giving up though.

 

i got hit by a car in september and i’m still alive.

 

 

there is something here on earth for me to accomplish.

 

 

 

i must achieve.

 

ps. heine bros

 

pps. .. i need to get a life because seriously, i just skate, rap, and make beats.

 

~ keep it all smiles

lets not get political and just laugh

The video below is from a Waka Flocka concert. For the readers who don’t listen to rap as much as I do, he’s gotten better. haha But anyways can we just drop the political shit for a moment and laugh at the fact that he wiped his arse with a shirt from somebody in the crowd? This seriously has to be the best thing I’ve seen all of 2017. haha

This will go one of two ways: either Trump rage tweets about the video as a way to distract from whatever scandal tomorrow brings, or he appoints Waka Flocka Flame as the new secretary for Health and Human Services, citing the rapper as a shining example for personal hygiene. A fan showed @WakaFlocka a trump jersey…

via Waka Flocka Flame wiped his ass with a Donald Trump t-shirt — Consequence of Sound

IoT

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I remember when I was much smaller I wanted a computer SOOO bad.
 
Everyone I knew had one.
 
On top of that, when people started getting cell phones I was last to get one. On the boot of it, I had to pay for my minutes because I wasn’t on my parents monthly plan.
 
Now that I have grown a lot older, I have managed to achieve those goals I had as a small child. I have a computer, smartphone, and a tablet that are all synced together. I am practically connected to every way that you could possibly access the internet, which was so precious to me when I was younger. Precious because I didn’t have access to it, knowing that all of my friends were on websites playing games and chopping it up in chat rooms.
 
Here I am years later with all the technology that I could possibly dream of and all I do is sit on facebook. My post are vulgar, full of errors and out right rants. I share memes, videos, and goofy pictures of my friends. I scroll hours at a time looking at pointless post that don’t mean a hill of beans in my life.
 
THIS is what I do each and every day, burning countless hours of my life in a virtual world where not one person can sincerely care about you. Status updates saying I’m depressed, countless unchecked notifications becasue it was just a “Like.”
 
this is what i do
 
I’m not sure if I like this. I have found myself lately finding joy in reading a book, minus the ebook part. I’ve been trying to find ways that I can be more productive and manage my time in a such a manner, that will allow me to accel forward.
 
The moral of this story is, my life is consumed in a bunch of likes, shares, and rude comments from characters who think the earth is flat. This is not what I envisioned. I honestly saw myself later on down the road as one of those nerds who spent a lot of time on Secondlife interacting with strangers who just want to dance to EDM music DJ’d by a guy in Guam.
 
I’m just saying.
 
Point being, I got what I want but now I don’t use it for what I initially intended it for.
 
~ Keep it all smiles