exploding rock™

qwerty with these dorito fingers

I’m trying to think of ways to get my mind back on track. Theres nothing wrong with me other than … never mind. Look, I’m here because I’m struggling. I’m just trying to live ya know? Isn’t this what we all want? A life? A future?

I find it quite hard to be intent and in the moment. Meditation used to work for me a long time ago but that slowly faded away. I’m not sure why but theres this feeling I can’t shake and I just don’t understand it. I don’t understand the fear and where it comes from. Why must everything come down to the decisions I make and why do I constantly stress over the small factors?

Peace isn’t just a dream but a reality. I achieved it once. Lasted for just a millisecond but the fact of the matter is, I did it. The feeling was wonderful, I can remember it vaguely but deep down I want to be right there again. Right now I’m just fixated on someone and it’s like, why? Why can’t I just have those moments where their not at the forefront of my mind.

this wasn’t proof read, i don’t care

~ keep it all smiles

September 6, 2019

doritos, high, love, weed
wish me luck

My nerves are unsettling leaving my brain in an altered state of crying.

This serves as my choices that have brought me here.

in 24 hours i have to tell you or i wont stop doing weird shit like this.

~ keep it all smiles

September 1, 2019
U ON MY MIND DAY IN AND DAY OUT AND THIS SHIT IS FUCKIN WITH ME

Shes all I think about and is all I want… but I don’t know why.

Why am I so attracted to her?

Why do I fall into a hypnotized state everytime I’m around her, almost speechless because I don’t wanna say something toO silly. Why do I even have these feelings and spend days talking about it to myself.

why?

somedays I try to make myself cry because I just want that emotional relief but i just can’t. I’m constantly wrapping my head around multiple different realities, always lost in another world.

Like fuck, I wrote a whole song about this chick? DO YOU HEAR ME GUYS! I WROTE A WHOLE ENTIRE SONG ABOUT A WOMAN AND SHE DOESN’T HAVE THE SLIGHTEST CLUE THAT ITS ABOUT HER. SHE HEARD IT!!!

i feel dumb sometimes because i make things way harder than life is supposed to be.

~ keep it all smiles

August 16, 2019

be, I, okay, question
her

I’ve been afraid to show my face

Its the reason why I have been gone

Deep within me I long for you

Its so challenging through my woes

You’re smile

You’re hair

You’re face

I so dearly miss it

I wish to see you more but you don’t seem to want me

It makes me sad and sometimes my eyes swell

Heartbreak I’ve met before

~ looking down cus’ God do

August 16, 2019
corrugated recycles

From time to time I tend to challenge myself with a little bit of bullshit.

Okay not really, I just thought that would be a good opening sentence because the rest of what I have to say may not even be relatable to you.

Its currently 71 degrees and rainy and here I stand with a laptop. My brain goes haywire just thinking about the actual history that has taken place at this house I live in. Before my parents moved in and brought me into this world apparently some old lady lived in my house.

Standing in the garage with the lightning illuminating off my keyboard, I can take a look and see the old wiring from when this garage had lights and a working door.

Today its bored up and those wires dangle loseley carrying no current like they once did.

I think something landed on my head and I’m not sure of what it could’ve been. Whatever it was had me swatting at my hair for 5 minutes only realising that I was just throwing more water all over my laptop cus my hair is SOAKED.

but whatever.

the internet needs to know that there are people like us who dwindle away at things that don’t even contribute to humanity. I mean shit, I know a guy who does nothing but watch anime by himself eating fast food all day. What kind of life is that?

i just write, i write bullshit becasue after its written i read through my poor grammar and laugh at my mistakes.

~ keep it all smiles

August 13, 2019

high, thc, weed
will change the image in time

I just realized that my blog is more SAD than exploding rock. All I do is write a bunch of weird shit that adds ups to an overall sad story. Whether I like it or not I haven’t figured out yet but with all of these words in my head, they gotta go somewhere?

~ keep it all smiles

August 11, 2019

always, bigger, happy, soon
ee

ee

he’s always after me in the most unconventional ways.

i must stay alert even if i have to hold my pee.

i’ll consider a change when im ready but my mind has been held prisoner.

who will save me.

who will change me.

will it be me or you?

~ keep it all smiles

August 11, 2019

but not, cherish, fuck, in love, inside, master, mindfullness, of, poetry, running, sacred, scared, stories, the, wish i had you, Writing
its okay

Long ago when I was young the days seemed long and my summers seemed precious. Thanks to age and defying storylines that created the most eccentric and fun filled memories of my life, I’ve become a man named Afro.

Afro is a simple guy, he smokes American Spirits, listens to the same rotation of music for long periods of time before he switches songs, and he is always after something.

These “somethings” can be but of many things. A computer, skateboards, an atlantis BIC, heine bros coffee, a woman, money, a college degree, and the list goes on.

With so much on the table, Afro feels overwhelmed and turns to vibrations of sound to express his feelings towards everyday life and how he is treated.

Sometimes Afro chains smokes cigarettes will drinking starbucks coffee that was brewed at home inside of a small little garage. This garage is what Afro has dubbed “Studio 24,” and creates a lot of his music inside of those four corners.

When Afro is alone he gets really sad, so sad that he smokes more weed and chains smokes more cigarettes to ease his mind as he tries to write through his blurry eyes. Even when Afro does this to himself he still doesn’t shed a single tear. He tries to but most of the time it doesn’t happen.

Frustrated Afro reaches for a bottle that only holds 24oz’s.

He then cries every tear he was holding in until he falls asleep.

~ keep it all smiles

August 11, 2019

blogging, careless, drive, gone, grammar card, home, lonely, no spell check, stand by, story, well, wish you were here, written
i laugh when im horny

My sunny days get perpetrated by black thoughts shading the horizon.

I often dream of different realities but none compare to the one that I’m living in at this very moment. It brings chills to my spine to even think such a way but who else really cares? I mean even though we travel the same frequency we’re all on different bands.

Without any of my misjudgment coming into play, it seems that what I see dwindling afar always seeps in the little crack it balances on. A rare but mystifying moment turns to sadness and grief. What does that even have to do with anything you might ask?

Well its simple.

nothing.

~ keep it all smiles

August 11, 2019

comedy, compelling, fb, fuck, google, gory, horny, hysterical, light, moon, myspace, nonsense, onre, sad, social media, stars, story, sun, whocares
WWW.

As I grow older I’ve learned that the internet is a really big place. Thanks to cookies and all that other data that websites collect from you, the WORLD WIDE WEB as we know it, now has become small and personal.

I’m not sure how I feel about personalized internet. It used to be that back in the day you could just open internet explorer and read a wide variety of news articles. Now we have feeds like the ones we use on facebook, twitter, and instagram. These feeds do exactly where the name says, IT FEEDS US INFORMATION. But not just anything, it’s all personalized just for your enjoyment.

The internet holds a wealth of knowledge and what blows my mind is how we walk around with these supercomputers in our pockets using them to post Tik Tok videos. Like I’m talking about snapdragon chips and intel processors inside some thin ass plastic and here I am recording myself yelling about some shit that pissed me off the other day.

Personalized internet closes the doors to what we knew as the WORLD WIDE WEB. Its as if the only idea about the internet that we hold dearly too is net neutrality.

The purpose for all of this madness I wrote is the anger I’m starting to feel about the news apps that are installed on my phone. No matter what app I try I’m given multiple categories of different interest. That shits cool and all but I want news that is not directly geared towards my interest. I want news collectively from all sources jumbled into one.

either that or maybe im just trippen.

~ keep it all smiles

August 7, 2019