Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature into his pictures.-Henry Ward Beecher
I often ask myself when I am going about my day, “What is life?”
I mean, what am I really doing here? I wake up, take care of my hygiene, get on the computer and then skate. On days I got school, I’ll do some studying and may even knock out my homework but thats it. I am literally doing nothing that makes me feel like I have accomplished something. I used to daydream a lot back in high school of where I would be by the age of 22 or 23. Here I am 20, still living with my parents, have no car, no credit, or anything that can say “Hey, this man is finically stable.” I feel miserable everyday I get up and do shit. The only thing in life that makes me feel complete and content with life is skateboarding. Even with skateboarding I run into problems such as falling or the weather decides to switch up. I still have my family all in my ear saying that I should stop skateboarding and because some sucker ass lawyer but what fun would that be?
The point is, the idea…the dream…the whatever the hell I had when I was younger has fizzled away and I’ve become another product of the lower class society in America. I’m considered a rebel, a kid who has chosen to go against the system and is called a hipster. Yeah, I said it, but I look like a bum so the word Hipster doesn’t even cut it. More like another “nigga” walking the face of this earth. I’ve also come across a shit ton of conclusions, I’ll list them below,
- I’ve failed at life
- Have a hard time talking to females
- My family is against my dreams in life
- UPS hates my existence = my job sucks
- and a bunch of other shit I’d rather not name
The shit I’m naming off and complaining about is probably the same bullshit many other young adults are going through. But is it really like this? Are we supposed to suffer and work long strenuous hours, maxing out our mental capacity’s?! And for what?! What I am doing right now that is benefiting me in any way, shape or form? I’m fucking trying man…I’m fucking trying. Every time I turn around my dads in my face about his business, my mom is asking for money, and my sister is being rude to people by not speaking. Why can’t I simply have one good day? One day where I can just skate and come home to a meal and my lady making my favorite pie?
I remember asking my friend Danny what the meaning of life is. He told me that life is a blank canvas and you can paint anything. I thought about it and was like “Wow, I fucking suck at art.”
What does “happiness” look like to you?
Happiness to me takes many shapes and forms. It comes to me through my skateboard, my art, my poems, raps and my personality. Happiness can take any form and look any way you want it. Its different for everyone. That’s what makes happiness so amazing.
The goal for every human being is to find happiness. Happiness is found in the most oddest places as well. For example, that drunk homeless man you see probably finds happiness inside of a bottle. That rich billionaire probably finds happiness within all of the money he has. One thing that people have to realize is that happiness comes and goes. We seek it but can only hold on to it for so long. Once its gone than we are in search for more of it because we miss the happiness we once held in the palm of our hands.
From a philosophical stand point, I see TRUE Happiness as attaining absolute knowledge. For as long we are here on this earth we will never be able to attain absolute knowledge. We will have to pass on and let our soul be free from this hurtful world to reach that goal.
Over all, happiness to me has no form. I may have said that it takes many shapes or forms but the true reality of what happiness looks like comes from within and from around.