In 2011 I wouldn’t have never thought that I would be where I am at today. Like back then I can really say that I had childish thoughts. I mean I was just in high school, I believe it was Junior year. I remember just looking off into the future dreaming of going AM for some skate team. I had it all planned out. But now as I look at everything I guess my heart wasn’t really where I wanted it to be. I really want this, I want to be able to skate any everywhere that I want and actually make a living from it. Maybe its my fear of hitting rails? I don’t know, I don’t mean to sound like a “diva” or anything.
Going back to the top, none of this seems to be real right now. I feel like I had other great plans and ideas. I literally got out of school and went into the world with no aim. I think I should have stuck with writing during the entire time. If I did that I would have gone way further than where I am right now with this. Its just so frustrating, my emotions run amidst a sea of dreadful and uncaring thoughts. I’m twisted in the head. I think thats my reasoning for smoking weed so much now. I have not other way of coping with my insanity. Its so bad, like I have a serious problem.
I can’t say that I will ever try to get this fixed but as far as I see right now? I won’t. I’m sorry for being such a waste to the world. But I regret saying that because this world means nothing to me if it choose’s to look down on me. Theres no need for the pity or the whiny ass “I’m sorrys” I don’t got time for that shit. Just leave me be dammit!
Anyways, thats me just ranting about life. Sorry for the depressing moment.
ps. You know I can’t leave you guys on a sad note. Keep up and stay humble and let the Universe work in your favor. Holla .
~ Keep it all smiles